Published on ReluctantPickle.com – Because You’re Already in Too Deep

👀 TL;DR

You’re here. It’s your first time playing pickleball. You don’t know the rules. You’re holding a paddle upside down.
Relax. This guide will keep you from committing a felony-level kitchen violation.

🫣 Step 1: Don’t Panic

Everyone out here looks like they’ve been training for the Pickleball Olympics.
They haven’t.
They just bought matching shirts and yell a lot.
You’ll be fine.

🎾 Step 2: The Equipment

Here’s what you should be holding:

  • A paddle (not a racquet — wrong sport)
  • A wiffle ball (technically called a pickleball, but it definitely looks like a dog toy)
  • Tennis shoes or court shoes (grip is key)

What you shouldn’t bring:

  • Flip-flops
  • A bad attitude
  • A 5-step dynamic warmup routine you saw on Instagram

🚫 Step 3: Do Not Step in the Kitchen

The kitchen is the 7-foot box on either side of the net.
You’re not allowed to hit the ball out of the air while standing in it.
If you step in early or volley from inside it — you’ll get called out… loudly.

🎯 Step 4: Serving Basics (This Ain’t Wimbledon)

  • Always serve underhand
  • Hit diagonally across the court
  • Ball must land past the kitchen on the other side

You only get one try. Fault? Your partner’s up. Don’t cry.

🔄 Step 5: The Double Bounce Rule

Both sides must let the ball bounce once after the serve:

  1. You serve → they let it bounce
  2. They return → you let it bounce

Only then can the slapping begin.

This rule exists solely to confuse beginners and stop people from camping at the net like a toddler in hide-and-seek.

🤷 Step 6: Scoring (Just Smile and Nod)

  • You only score when your team is serving
  • Games are played to 11 (win by 2)
  • Someone will call the score wrong — ignore it and keep playing

When in doubt, just say, “Yeah, sounds right.”

🤐 Step 7: Don’t Be That Person

  • No coaching mid-rally
  • No passive-aggressive “Nice try”
  • Don’t scream “OUT!” unless you’re sure
  • Don’t argue the score unless you enjoy ruining friendships

Remember: this is recreation, not a Netflix docuseries.

🧠 Final Tips for Surviving Your First Match

  • Hit soft before you hit hard
  • Apologize often
  • Keep your feet moving
  • Laugh when you mess up (you will)

This is not the U.S. Open. It’s cardio disguised as chaos.
Breathe. Survive. Repeat.

Franklin Sports Pickleball Paddle + Ball Starter Set


👉 Franklin Pickleball Starter Set on Amazon

“If you’re starting from scratch, grab a paddle set like this one from Franklin. It comes with two paddles and balls — enough gear to pretend like you know what you’re doing.”

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